What to do when your actions don’t match your choices

You know what’s always going to stop your transformation into the person you want to be with the fulfilling work and life you want?

Telling yourself the story that it’s all or nothing.

Loosen up a little. Life isn’t all or nothing.

You can be all in AND you can have days when you don’t do what you wanted. Days when you forget to be the person you are becoming. Days when you don’t go for that run, make that call, write that paragraph, wear the red jumper, experiment with that idea, do your course work, try something new. You can have days like that because you WILL have days like that because you are in transition between the way you used to think and behave and be, and the way the you you’re becoming thinks and behaves and is.

Transition can feel messy. You might make mistakes, you might not be or do what you know you wanted to do for all kinds of reasons. When that happens you have a choice: give up (staying stuck in ‘all or nothing’ thinking) or recommit and take one small step further through your time of transition.

Recommitting to your choice to be all in is much more powerful than ‘all or nothing’ because it’s a sustainable way of moving forward through those rocky, uncertain times of becoming.

Each day, recommit to choosing what is in service of future you. Because future you is the result of your choices TODAY.

Recommit!!

Self-care IS radical leadership

What did self-care look like this month?

It looked like dealing with the post-Christmas and Covid piles of empty bags and boxes, clearing out the old to make way for the beautiful new gifts we’d received, packing things away and recycling others in various ways, and taking time out to rest before the school run. It looked like sitting down to play and read and rest. It looked like keeping the laptop off for the whole day.

A few months ago I would have struggled with a big burden of guilt feeling like I ‘should’ have been working while small was at school. I should have been doing, doing, doing on the business, on learning, on catching up on course work.

The truth is that those feelings cropped up, of course – Wonder Woman I am not, and I led myself THROUGH them. I received them, felt the guilt and let those feelings exist, no fighting. Fighting takes way too much energy, and the last thing I need is a power drain – that’s what I’m plugging by clearing the mess! 😂 Then I recommitted to my choice to tackle the mess I was tolerating because I know for sure not doing so will hold me back as I evolve and grow into my next level of who I AM and BE. It will sap my energy and fester into an attitude of coasting to get by and lack of focus. I know this because I have been there before.

I chose a different experience.

I chose self-care.

Self-care isn’t all massages, baths, candles and a mani. Sure, it can be, and It also looks like replenishing energy by clearing away energy drains, getting rid of what I’m tolerating in my life, and going into the big wide world and having fun playing!!

Is 2022 the year you choose to lead yourself through with self-care…?

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If you want to make this year the year you finally take a radical step forward in your self-leadership and ability to make choices that serve YOU and who you know you can BECOME, let’s talk.

What to do when fear stops you

You know what fear does? It stops you. It keeps you safe. Too safe. It’s not anyone’s fault, it’s the way your brain is hard-wired.

You know what helps get you into action without getting paralysed by fear? Breaking it down into tiny, laughable, ridiculously small steps. So small you laugh out loud at the thought. Like stand on a treadmill as a first step in creating an exercise regime. Or throw away the first bite of a bar of chocolate to eat less of it. Or do one minute preparation of the most difficult thing on your to-do list. It’s even got a name: Kaizen. Originally a Japanese business philosophy it’s now recognised as hugely helpful way of getting through fear in career change, health and vitality, sports, business – in fact wherever fear shows it’s face, Kaizen applies!

Laughing at your first step? Great, go do it!!!

Sure, you won’t always need to break it down so small because you’ll stretch what feels comfortable so it takes greater steps to kick in your fear centre in your brain. But anytime you find yourself getting totally stuck, make your first step TINY.

There is HUGE power in TINY!!“Don’t look for the big, quick improvement. Seek the small improvement one day at a time. “ – John Wooden, basketball coach

Each tiny step creates momentum. It’s a lot easier to stay on the bike than stop and have to start again, so keep up the tiny actions so you don’t have to stop.

If what you want feels impossibly big, try out the Kaizen technique and start to move.

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Ready for 2022 to be your Best Year where you say NO to fear and YES to changing up the gears to make your life more incredible than it already is, come and join me at this online two-part event! There is NO charge. I know…. 😂

Registration is open. We’ll kick off on 25th January. We’ll create the kind of space you need to reflect on what you’ve learned from 2021, create clarity on the areas you want to grow, transform or level up your life, business and career in 2022.

Your best year for best you is coming. Do you want to play?

What’s your timescale for success?

Recently I experienced two moments that made me stop and congratulate clients and my own growth in who I am now as a leader.

One of my clients told me 20 minutes into our planned call of one hour that in that time they’d already uncovered the insights they really needed that day. We wrapped up ten minutes later after digging deeper into those insights and the actions that would support their even greater learning.

One client told me half way through our planned six week engagement that she already had everything she had hoped for – clarity on her career direction. It didn’t take as long as either of us expected and now we’re using the time to create what she wants to support her leadership in the next step.

Transformation never happens on the timescales we expect or desire. Sometimes it’s quick, sometimes it’s slow. It’s a dance of beautiful uncertainty. It’s brilliant to never know what will come and what new ideas or inspiration will suddenly pop up from a challenging question in a new direction.It’s always surprising, fascinating and exciting! And I love being a witness and leader in the process of change!! 😀

Change IS possible. When you are ready to make it happen.

2022…?

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If you are ready to make real change to your career and life, we should talk.

What will set you up for success in 2022?

It’s been a brilliant morning completing the final call of the career change programme I’ve been co-leading for the last 8 weeks. I’m sitting at my desk bathing in the gloriously unexpected sunshine, and basking in the fabulousness of hearing how amazingly far each participant has come in such a short time. I’ve got so much love in my heart for each one of them. 😍

I felt myself welling up with happiness and grinning from ear-to-ear (yes, I do both at the same time 🤣) as they described what they have available now to support them in their career changes that they didn’t have at the start. Things like: tools to take action even when they don’t have all the answers, people in their career change corner supporting and encouraging them, confidence to talk to people and carry out experiments knowing they have what they need to design and evaluate each action they take. It’s so incredibly inspiring to see them moving from feeling fearful, hopeless, stuck, scared, full of dread and burnt out to courageous, hopeful, taking action and creating momentum, excited and energised. And I leave feeling exactly the same!!

Being around people who are transforming their lives ALWAYS has a knock on effect. Always.

Courageous.

Hopeful.

In action.

Excited.

Energised.

Pretty good words to finish off 2021… and we are not even there yet! So I’ve chosen to make a conscious decision to stay in those right up to 31 December. I want to finish this year strong and boldly.

What words are you embracing for the rest of your 2021 to finish strong and set yourself up for 2022?